I don't care if you have a supportive boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, stage Mom, 1 million fans, birds flying around your head like Cinderella, or any other human or animal posse surrounding you - if you can't cheer yourself on you won't even be able to hear the cheers from everybody else.
No matter what industry you're in, getting a pat on the back from your boss, partners, client, or fan feels great! But, at the end of the day if you can't motivate yourself and make yourself feel good the compliments will fade very quickly. When we don't have enough belief in ourselves we start doing / creating to settle our craving for compliments instead of doing / creating to our greatest potential regardless of who cares. We start walking on hot coals for these cheers and compliments from other people. We get nervous and we ultimately burn our feet (and probably grit our teeth, smile and keep walking.) We get stuck on a moving sidewalk going down an endless terminal instead of being on an elevator.
Lets be honest though, cheering yourself on all the time is exhausting and it's really not fair!! At least thats what I thought, until I figured out that being your own cheerleader is one of the greatest powers that we have. And if we channel it correctly, achieving short term goals begin to happen at a much steadier pace, which ultimately turns into accomplishing big long term goals.
So, first, how do we "be our own cheerleaders"? We have to decide that first and foremost we are going to be accountable to ourselves. Not to Social Media, not to Mom or Dad, and not to anyone that's knocked us down. Sure, you can take the "haters fuel" and use that, but it only lasts for a short period of time before the fire burns out leaving you cold in the snow. Being accountable to ourselves means we set goals for our own personal fulfillment, not for anyone else approval. We have to commit to ourselves. Whether that goal is to change the world or pass a class, we need to make a promise to ourselves that our goals and focus will be accomplished in order to grow ourselves - not for anyones approval or to get noticed. Once you can pep talk yourself into this mindset, you're on the team - you're the captain of (insert your name here)'s cheer team.
Now it's time to get into shape. For a long time I always whined and complained that I needed other peoples approval or "high five's" to make me happy. Insert pouty face. And yes, it is true that having solid people to lean on and encourage you is a major key in life, but with that being said, who closes your eyes at night and gets you out of bed each morning? You and only you.
How do you stay motivated as a cheerleader? You keep yourself inspired by making good habits. Set time aside to do things, listen to things, and read things that inspire you. A movie, a good book, music, a hike, a concert, etc. It is your job as the captain of the cheerleading squad to target the things that inspire and motivate you and make sure you plug them into your day. Yes, daily. It's also your job to check your levels, like your windshield wiper fluid or your phone battery percentage. If you're feeling sluggish, have writers block, or feel self conscious, take action! Plug in. Remove your cord from the smoking, sparking outlet before you burn up, and plug it into something meaningful. We have absolutely no excuse to let ourselves get electrocuted or get lit on fire. Be good to yourself. You have to be able to know what you need and when you need it - I've found that this just takes time in getting to know yourself better.
Once you've started to get a handle on knowing when to starting yelling LETS GO, LETS GO, L-E-T-S G-O it gets easier and easier to start jumping up and down for yourself. The more you practice this, the easier it will become and you will start to see a more steady pace in your self-confidence and happiness. You won't be as shakable and you'll stay focused on your goals instead of getting a crick in your neck from looking around for compliments.
Regardless of cheers from friends, family, fans, clients, etc. if we can't say YAY, GO ME, GO ME, I AM AWESOME, HERE I COME, we will never be truly happy, no matter what goal we crush.
Ps, I always thought it was "crink" not "crick". Mom? Dad? What? Yikes.